Marriage Relationships 101
Marriage Relationships 101
Marriage Relationships 101
We live in a world with more distractions to steal our attention than humanity has ever experienced before.
We must be able to trust when things appear to be going nowhere in our lives. We must have faith that there is something going on that we cannot comprehend or see. Recent research indicates that during the early stages of being in love, our brains may secrete a powerful amphetamine-like neurotransmitter called phenylethylamine, bathing our central nervous system with an overdose of nature's most potent love cocktail.
When we return to earth, however, we are left with our vision of who we can be and the reality of who we think we are. Or we find ourselves turning to old ways of numbing, be it food, chemicals, a new lover, computers, work or any other way which keeps us out of touch with what is really going on in our hearts and guts.
By agreeing ahead of time to talk only about one topic and nothing else, couples can make significant progress on an issue. One of the most common (and most frustrating) relationship dynamics that we hear about is couples who feel emotionally wounded by each other on a regular basis. They both love each other, and want to stay together, yet they keep hurting each other through verbal abuse, physical rejection, taking each other for granted, betraying emotional trust, or bringing up the most vulnerable topics from their partner's past.
When we work with couples and encourage them to make a solid commitment to the truth, they often say things like, ''Well I'm afraid to tell her what I really feel she might leave me'' or ''If he knew that I had done that, he'll hate me forever, so I can't tell him'' or ''If she knew that I wanted to do X, Y and Z sexually, she'd think I was sick.They speak fondly of their visions of close, happy, loving moments with that one special partner, sharing all aspects of themselves and their lives with their true soul mate. And then they embark on that most intimate of journeys, the journey of love, which always starts within ourselves.
If dating and courtship were practiced correctly today, they would form the foundation of a beautiful relationship between a husband and wife as God ordained it. The two would spend a lifetime together enjoying much happiness and joy. Cohabitation is not the only bad side effect resulting from divorce. It is important to stop and look at the childrenthe most painful fruitsof these failed marriages.
We are all capable of greater acts of love and truth than we may believe. We are all capable of being more honest, more clear, more loving, more unselfish.
On a serious note, I come to know every other day about how couples are getting divorced without even completing a year together.
The first year of marriage can be VERY difficult maybebecause both of you have certain expectations in mind for each other. As many married couples know, there's good reason to invest the time into a good relationship.
People who are in healthy, happy marriages have less stress, better health and are better able to deal with the challenges of life.
It has become clear that marriages are not lasting as long as they once did, back in the era of the baby boomers from these survey results.Ask anyone that you know who is over twenty one years old, and it's likely they can name at least one of their friends who has been divorced after a marriage shorter than eight years.
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