Mature men: help is on the way
Mature men: help is on the way
Mature men: help is on the way
Mature men: help is on the way!
In a world which appears bent upon marginalizing the alpha male there is hope on the horizon.
Everything is changing from what it was to what it will be and for those of us bearded in our man caves who are used to our image of us, this new world introduces an uneasy sensation.
Let's face facts, the world we men live in really hasn't changed all that much. It is as it was for our dads, grand dads, great-grand dads and so on. It is our perception which is under attack and we aid in the attack. Unwittingly, yes, but it's more submissive compliance than conscious aid. It is a submissive compliance we eagerly accept. It is what we've been trained to do. This is not any fault of ours; it is just the way things are. We are driven by how we are hard wired. All the socializing that goes on to make us unlikely to respond to our basic urges has had but little affect on that wiring.
The realm of the "Kings Castle" is the real world in which we men live and a man's home is his castle. That sounds idyllic doesn't it? Outside our castle, in the company of other men, we can be the man' we envision and learned to be during our formative years; it is where we understand the rules of competition. It is where we claim our title "King." We flourish in that environment.
We like to think that way but consider this: we are called the "King of our Castle" because the female there lets us be called "King." She can just as easily demote us from that fairy land position, so who really is in charge? The Queen is. Who has ultimate veto power over every decision made within the walls of our castle? Right! And it ain't us! Oh, sure some of us flail against the situation. Some of us stomp about proclaiming we make the decisions within our kingdom and push out our chest at our supposed superiority, but deep down we know its all bluff. Does the phrase "if momma ain't happy, you can't be" mean anything to you?
We learn at our mother's knee our place in the society that really matters; the one inside the house we live in... All the fuss outside that house stops at the doorway. The wise among us don't fight this for very long. Once past puberty the real facts of life with a female sink in.
There are instances of a man battering against his real status using the weapons he knows and we learn about the results in news reports where he is escorted from his castle in irons by the local constabulary for causing the female to be frightened of him. Those who lose control of their better self and actually strike out are in every way wrong. Physical violence is just not right, and this is carried to limits which effectively compromise all our basic instincts for handling conflict. Guess who learns all those other skills for handling conflict during their formative years. Yep, it's her.
The fact is, females fight in a different manner than the male. When the confrontation is confined to female vs. female we superior beings chuckle at the cat fight. At how they whisper behind the others back and how they enforce their viewpoint with attitude.
We have learned the pecking order within our male group during our formative years and we know the bigger guy can take your ice cream cone if he wants it. We learn respect for power. We learn respect for size, ability, achievement. We respect those higher up in the pecking order and accept where we are in that order. We learn that another male's confidence indicates he believes he can back up place in the pecking order with force. That force can be physical if necessary, but that has been mostly socialized out of us. We've replaced it with proof of achievement in most situations, as demonstrated by appearance and having things.' The one with the most toys wins is the mantra. Our world functions quite well as long as it is limited to the world of males.
Our basic needs figuratively castrate us in conflicts with our female. In order to get what we need, we must give her what she wants which means all our weapons are made useless. Once we have been accepted as companion for the female the attributes it took to gain acceptance become superfluous, mostly. We spend all of our time seducing the female.
We have instinctively learned the art of seduction but we haven't learned the price of using that skill and even if we do learn, our basic needs trump what our head tells us. We think with a different part of our body than our head, so the saying goes. So we accept her criticisms, selection of what we wear, how we speak, who we socialize with, the colors of our abode, what we eat, and our opinions on about every subject as part of our scheme of seduction. We are subservient to our hard wiring.
Now for the good news. Mother Nature supplies you relief. It comes at different times of life for different men and sneaks up on you over time. Don't fall for that blue pill trap. Welcome the later years of life where the excitement of our most sought after activity is not as is once was. Where the effort to obtain cooperation from our female is not worth what you get. Instead of fighting this decline of consuming interest, embrace it. See this as the liberation it is. Break the chains of servitude. The day you do you will find a whole new life. When threatened with sleeping on the couch' there will be no punishment association. The ultimate weapon against you is rent ineffective. She will have some adjustment to make but once that is over the relationship you share will be on a much better level. It will be one of equality; one of mutual respect. And best of all for you: you will be the person you want to be.
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