Screwed Up With Your Woman? Follow These 3 Steps To Avoid a Fight

Screwed Up With Your Woman? Follow These 3 Steps To Avoid a Fight

You were late for dinner. You missed an important date with her. You forgot something she had asked you to do. Essentially, you did something to make your woman upset with you. Your first instinct may be to offer her an explanation about what happened, but here are some reasons why you should avoid that urge and instead focus on making her feel better first, the right way.

If you delve right into your explanation about why you screwed up then she will not feel better about the situation. There is one crucial thing that many men do not know when it comes to women, and that is that women need you to really understand why she is upset with you. And she wants you to validate those reasons for being upset.

She does not just want to hear what you have to say to make her feel better about the whole thing but she does want to talk to you about how it made her feel, and she wants you to really get those feelings and let her know you understand how she felt.

When you head straight into the explanation then you are essentially saying that her feelings don't matter. For instance, if you had a fight with your woman and you say "I'm sorry that I got so upset, but it's just that you were being so bossy towards me..." then she will hear that she is the reason the fight started and that she should be the one apologizing to you. This will send her into defensive mode and make her feel like you are completely blaming her for the fight. Even if you are just trying to offer a true explanation of how you felt this will not go over well.

You can see how this will lead to another fight and another until the explanations stop and the talking begins. A better approach besides offering an explanation would be to follow these steps.

1. Apologize

Don't offer an excuse or reason just yet. Apologize first and let her hear that you are sorry.

2. Listen to Her.

Women need to talk about their feelings. It's their way of getting all of their emotions straight and back on track, and allows them to feel better about the situation. Whether you understand the process a woman goes through or not you have to respect that it is a process and allow her to go through it.

3. Respond to Her Appropriately.

So many men say nothing after this point which is a big mistake. If you think saying nothing is better than saying something wrong, you are wrong! When you say nothing it sends her the message that you don't care about what she said to you AND that you don't feel bad about what happened. This will make her feel even less appreciated by you and it will send her into a deeper place of anger or resentment.

Your response should be something that validates what she has said to you. She will let you know how she feels about the situation and how you have made her feel. She may let you know that you were being selfish, mean, or inconsiderate of her feelings. Take the meaning of what she says and respond to her appropriately.

For example if you were late for a date and she felt that you were being inconsiderate of her feelings then you should respond by letting her know that you were being inconsiderate of her feelings and how you understand how you made her feel. This will go over much better than telling her how it was only a few minutes that you were late by, and it will save you hours, or days, of her being upset with you.

Follow these three steps when you screw up and you will have a much easier time getting her though her anger. It's your choice, take the time to listen to her and validate her feelings or deal with the anger for days, weeks, or months to come.

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