Selecting A Daycare Center Without The Tears

A very large percentage of new mothers on maternity leave while caring for their

newborns have seriously considered the thought of finding a way to be financially okay without returning to work once the leave has run out. I bet the percentage is as large as 75, 90 or even higher who crunch numbers, lay out budgets and crunch the numbers once again in the vain hope that they can stay with their baby without working away from home. Unfortunately, the vast majority of them must go back to work to support the family. This ultimate realization does not come without guilt and falling tears. They are forced to select a day care center for their new baby and are determined to choose the very best one they can find.

What do the best day care centers look like? How do you find such a place? First, a decision must be made as to what type of day care center is best for your situation. A well-reputed state-licensed daycare facility provides security, the latest curriculum and modern equipment. A home daycare setting involves a local mother whom you know and you also know loves kids and will probably care for your child as if it were her own. Nannies come to your home and care for your baby in his own surroundings, making it very comfortable for him. Then there is the loving friend or relative who would just love to care for baby Nicki and no, it's no trouble at all. Each category has things to like and things to dislike and these must be carefully weighed before a decision is made.

The great thing about the state-licensed day care facility is you know that the staff has passed strict background checks and have attended at least some classes in early childhood development and education. The center will provide a state-mandated ratio of teachers to children so each child will receive the care they need. The drawbacks to this group setting is that if one child has a cold, they all have a cold and if one of them cries they all start bawling in unison. As fine as the staff to child ratio may be, there will not be enough of them to hug all the kids or put them on their laps for comforting.

A home daycare provides one caregiver to cater to your child's needs and becomes something of a surrogate mother. A strong attachment often forms between a child and a home daycare provider. But what happens if that caregiver herself gets sick? Or one of her own children? Do you want her to take your child along on her daily errands? When her family decides to go on vacation, where will your child go? And what will his reaction to another new environment?

A nanny seems always to be a fine choice. The nanny comes to your baby's home to care for him where he is at his comfortable best. A strong attachment can also become part of this type of arrangement. Again, you face the problem of what to do when nanny gets ill, goes on vacation or takes a day off for personal reasons.

Grandma or the loving neighbor who offered their services can also be a good deal. You do trust them, but shouldn't they have a life of their own? Yes, they should, and you shouldn't plan on them staying with your baby for very long.

There is no right or wrong answer for every situation. Parents must weigh all the pros and cons, and make that decision for their own family, but there are some considerations that apply to all of these options. Cost should never be the primary concern, but realistically, it needs to be considered. A stranger should never be engaged to care for a child without providing some kind of reassurance as to their character, be it a few strong references, or a state-sponsored background check. Many state child welfare agencies make this service available to private entities. Also, a caregiver should agree that a parent may appear at the daycare site at any time without prior notice. For older children, a discussion of discipline methods is a must, and expectations about use of time can make care for school-agers easier for everyone.

The key to making this difficult decision is planning. It should never be left until the last minute. Parents should accept that the guilt and the tears will likely come, but a well thought out, careful plan will lessen the stress of this decision for the whole family.

by: Thad Pryor

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