Solitude And Loneliness-not As Similar As They May Seem

When the words "solitude and loneliness" come up

, people often go through a predictable pattern of behavior. The most common instinct when faced with someone who is lonely or alone is to offer encouraging words of advice or to help that person find a way out of their emotional dilemma. However, the fact of the matter is that not everyone who is lonely can be helped, and not everyone who seeks solitude needs help.

A closer comparison of solitude vs loneliness will actually reveal a world of incongruity between the two states. This is not to say of course that both conditions are mutually exclusive. In fact, many people who are routinely in solitude-whether or not it is of their doing-suffer from loneliness to a considerable degree. Prolonged solitude can in fact be a primary cause of loneliness, just as it can be a result of an overbearing feeling of loneliness.

However, a line has to be drawn between people who seek solitude intentionally and for positive reasons, and those for whom solitude is a natural result or symptom of loneliness. The main difference is often a matter of choice. Most people cannot help but wallow in loneliness, even when they know they have to make an effort to get out of that condition. Of course, it isn't always that easy to get over loneliness. Particularly in cases wherein loneliness is caused by deeper seated emotional issues such as depression, the sufferer is often locked into a patter of behavior from which there is no escape.

As for solitude, many people routinely seek isolation as a means to gain a clearer perspective of the world around them. When used properly, a bit of solitude can work wonders in rejuvenating and even healing the spirit. At the very least, well planned periods of solitude can give the person time to think without the pressures of superfluous distractions getting in the way.

How then does one assess the characteristics of solitude vs loneliness? It would be helpful to think of it this way: while solitude so often comes about because of-or as a precursor to-loneliness, it is more often a solitary state actively sought after by the person. Most people in solitude choose to be in that situation, and as mentioned previously, the reasons need not be distress or depression. In fact, many people who seek solitude are quite happy to do so, and many return to normal society without any lasting ill-effects, and perhaps even better for the experience.

With loneliness on the other hand, the person suffering often has no say in the matter, and feeling of loneliness often come up unbidden. It is also often just as difficult to get out of being lonely as it is to get into it in the first place. In severe enough case of loneliness, the person may shy away from personal contact and social activity, even if they are precisely what are needed to break free from the shackles of loneliness.

by: Gen Wright

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