Speed Dating

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Speed Dating
True story - I once went on a speed dating event up in London. I had to travel up by train and it took me nearly an hour to get there. I arrived at the popular venue but could not see a sign or helpful young lady handing out badges as I had expected so I discreetly, and sheepishly asked at the bar 'where all the single people were'? I was told by a fairly irksome youth that there were a lot of single people around and realising because of the noise in the bar, my message had not got across, I mentioned the speed dating event.
"Speed dating", the guy shouted across the bar. "Speed dating, what in here"?
Yes, I replied, in very hushed tones, not wanting to draw attention to a sad singleton.
"Hang on I will ask around". At which point he shouted to all the other staff behind the bar and around collecting glasses, "Does anyone know anything about speed dating, this guy has come to speed date"?
They all replied, very loudly of course, in a Monty Pythonesque style, "Speed dating, what in here? No, no speed dating in here tonight". I was asked if I had the right night and if I really meant 'speed dating', like the first ten mentions of it hadn't been enough.
Finally the duty manager, well I assume he was the manager as he was over 14 but I have no idea what duty he performed, told me that they did have those events from time to time but none was organised for that night.
Then the customers at the bar starting asking me about speed dating, what it was like, did it work. I couldn't really comment as this was my first time and it wasn't going terribly well so far.
I sloped out of the bar, and returned home.
I had an email waiting. The event had been cancelled.
I never went again.
I never went again.
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