Top tips on how to find the right counsellor (part 1)
Top tips on how to find the right counsellor (part 1)
Working as a counsellor in Bristol with clients suffering from depression, anxiety or other mental health difficulties, I have been more and more aware that for many people, finding a suitable therapist is not as straightforward as it might seem at first. All of us naturally look for the most appropriate ways to address our needs in all areas of our lives, be it a garage to repair our car, a school for our child or a doctor helping us with a particular physical ailment. In those times of decision-making we employ our enquiry and research skills and often ask friends for recommendations, compare products or services on the internet or simply pick the first available option.
But with counselling, the matter can be slightly more sensitive' than calling a plumber to fix our boiler. The primary difference lies obviously in the fact, that a counsellor or therapist will have a direct access to our private life, our innermost feelings, dreams, wishes, fears and anxieties. For therapy to be successful we must be able to let the professional touch our heart and mind with their own humanity and that means allowing them to step inside the confines of our often tightly guarded private business'. The counsellor will have the power to support us, inspire us, and positively challenge us, but also abuse us, belittle us or simply ignore us. For this reason, picking the right' counsellor is best done systematically and intelligently. In this article I will attempt to outline the basic recommendations regarding our search for a suitable counsellor.
1. Do your homework consider the practicalities
This means spending enough time doing your basic research. Things you need to consider at this stage are:
The location are you able or willing to travel regularly for your sessions?
The gender of the counsellor many of us have natural preferences in this regard, and they are often based on our previous life experiences or the nature of the issue we want to work on
Affordability being realistic about your financial situation. A session costing you 40 per week can be a huge expense if your finances are tight
2. CBT, Humanistic or Gestalt?
There are many therapeutic approaches and some will suite you more than others. The differences lie in they way your counsellor will work with you, the skills she will be using and to which degree she will be directing the sessions. The question of different counselling modalities is an important one, but what is more essential is the quality of the therapeutic relationship between the counsellor and the client, regardless of their theoretical orientation. For a comprehensive list of therapeutic approaches, visit the BACP website.
3. Know, where to look
There are directories available on the internet where you can search for counsellors and therapists according to different criteria. You can have a look by googelling 'Counselling directory', 'BACP - seeking a therapist', or 'CP directory'. If, on the other hand, you know someone who could recommend a counsellor or therapist from their own experience, go with that. Ask around and talk to people whose opinion you trust. A personal recommendation will often save you a lot of energy and time and will give you more confidence to go ahead with making your appointment.
4. Decide, what you want from counselling
Many clients I see for counselling are at first not really clear about what they want from the therapeutic work. They usually express a wish to feel better' or stop this terrible feeling'. This is understandable as it describes a genuine wish to change things and counsellors can help clients in exploring this issue before the actual therapeutic engagement begins. But if it is in any way possible, try to look a bit deeper. Becoming more specific about the particular aspects of our lives we would like to look at in counselling will help us in making decisions about the direction of the counselling journey. This information will also be important during your first meeting with the counsellor.
End of part 1
In part 2 I will explain why counselling actually starts as soon as we pick up the phone and call the counsellor to book our first appointment. We will also look at the significance of the first session, what to look for when we sit face-to-face with our prospective counsellor and how to know if we found the right one'.
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