What Not to Do in Order to Get Your Ex Back
What Not to Do in Order to Get Your Ex Back
Relationship breakups have been part of the human landscape since the beginning of time. It is amazing how the very thing that brings us the most pleasure also brings with it the most grief. This is because almost anyone can attest to the fact that a healthy relationship is one of the most sort-after things in life. This is because a healthy relationship adds to the quality of our lives and colors everything else around us. We derive our wholeness and even our self-esteem on being in healthy social settings. A bad relationship therefore, sucks the very life out of us and leaves us feeling dry and famished. Many relationships that break do not recover. On the flip side of it though, there are those which do. If you want to win back your ex, there are certain things that you CANNOT do. Let's see what these are.
The first thing you must NOT do is-you must not stalk and hound your ex. This is difficult to pull off for most people. This is because, other than with the exception of a few, many relationships have lasted longer than 2 years. What this essentially means is that the two lives have literally become intertwined. You most likely have the same friends and even the same places which you frequent.
The challenge is to suddenly pull back and not hang around your ex anymore. The reason this is recommended is because time apart allows first and foremost for the healing process to take place. If healing is not allowed to take place, you can have worse relationships in the future.
Time apart also helps the two of you process what just happened. In many breakups, emotions usually take the best of the couple. The time duration set for the couples to process the breakup is essential. This is because it also allows the couple to decide whether the decision to part ways was the best decision that they made. When the two of you live separately for a while, it allows you to process whether life apart from each other is really what you truly want.
Another thing you must absolutely NOT do if you are gearing to win back your ex is to initiate contact. It is understandable that the breakup of a treasured relationship hurts and also contributes to feelings of extreme loneliness. It is perfectly understandable that there will be days when you wish your ex was right there with you. It is also common for you to feel that there are things that you want to tell your ex that are burning within you. It is during this time that there is the overwhelming urge to pick up the phone and call them or email them or text-message them.
STOP. Do not proceed with the phone call. You must create a notable "distance" between you and your loved one in order for them to truly miss you and value you. When they miss you they will value you and it is then that you can even begin to formulate a plan for a viable comeback.