Why Jealousy Can Bring Down Your Relationship

Over jealous and possessive partners put at risk the core elements this behaviour intends to uphold

. Know the signs to look out for if your relationship is heading in this direction...

Jealousy in itself is a normal reaction when a partner blatantly crosses boundaries through obvious sexual remarks or physical behaviour, or if a relationship has had infidelity issues in the past.

Someone who is jealous by instinct almost certainly will lack self confidence. A jealous person by nature feels threatened that their looks, personality, wit or sense of humour won't stack up against other admirers their partner comes into contact with. By limiting a partners exposure to other people builds both anxiety and resentment whereby the relationship becomes a battle for survival.

By keeping your other half on an increasingly short leash is not the way to overcome jealousy. Take proactive measures to work on any self esteem and self image issues. Confidence in itself is a powerful attraction and is the best way to keep your partners attention on you.

* Trust issues

Being rejected and devastating break ups is part of the journey on the road of love and broken hearts. Tender moments in our lives tend to bare resemblance on our future relationships - commonly known as baggage. Our collection of bad memories can become emotional scars and usually supersede the good ones over time.

People often tend to take these bad memories with them into new relationships and devise strategies to prevent more bad memories. Infidelity memories from the past usually remain close to a person well into future relationships and a new partner may be heavily scrutinized when it comes to associating in social circles which can equate to possessive behaviour.

Jealousy is the result that destroys trust and will fade the very alliance that keeps lovers together. Establishing trust, self esteem and communication holds the key to monogamy. Keeping watch over someone you are dating will never prevent a betrayal if the person is programmed to cheat.

* No-one likes to be possessed

Jealousy goes beyond competitors who show romantic interest in a partner. A possessive person can also seek to dominate other aspects of their partners life. Untrusting people could aim to restrict their partners contact with friends, family or personal pursuits.

Someone who is typically a jealous person will instinctively set out to confine, control and supervise another persons conduct and decisions. A jealous person will systematically question the where a bouts of their partner, demand to know what was said in conversations with other people, intercept text messages or demand to know why they didn't answer their phone.

Relationships can only develop in a positive manner if a couple can still maintain their own identities and are allowed freedom within that union. It brings a healthy state of mind to be able to pursue life's challenges, and not be brought down through someone else's personality disorder.

Unwarranted jealousy will ( in the end ) kill off any hope of retaining a romantic bond, as the saying goes "let there be space in your togetherness".

by: M Fuller

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