3 Giant Ways to Help Yourself

Others may try to effect change in us, but we are the most important factor for implementing change

. A person has to want to move forward before progression or change can occur. Use these 3, giant ways to help yourself and achieve success.

Be Unbiased

You aren't always going to have perfect, wonderful, happy and yummy thoughts. There will be times when you feel like a negative, train wreck on a self-crash course. The idea here is to be unbiased and listen to your mind before attempting to make your thoughts more positive. If you are feeling really stressed out one day it would be difficult (or impossible) to just snap out of it and all of a sudden feel on top of the world. The goal is only to feel a little bit better in any given moment. First, listen and hear what your thoughts are saying. Have you had thirteen, totally unrelated negative thoughts in the past thirteen minutes? Your mind is only trying to tell you something. The things you are saying to yourself may not even be true. Sit quietly and listen and be unbiased or non-judgmental as you listen. Don't try to change them right away. Picture them as clouds in the sky - passing slowly and they will pass.

Live in the Now

Our minds are always pushing us into the future or into the past. Very rarely do we have thoughts based around the present moment, which is strange because there are billions of miniature-perceptions entering our minds each and every second. The goal here is to, again, listen from an unbiased perspective. Are you revisiting a specific, traumatic event? Are you purposely recalling events that made you very angry - all at once? Are you regretting something? All of these types of thoughts are pulling you further and further away from the present moment. Sometimes therapy is the best way to overcome these types of thought processes. In therapy, your therapist may help you to revisit these recurring events and give you suggestions for coping with the emotions that result from revisiting them. That way, you won't have to revisit them on a daily basis - which can become counterproductive.

Practice Positive Coping

Positive, coping skills are those skills which contribute to your well-being. Smoking, drinking, caffeine or suppression are on the short list of negative, coping mechanisms. Positive, coping skills include relaxation, meditation, reading, crying or screaming into a pillow. Sometimes setting boundaries is an important factor in positive coping since a lot of stress rises from boundary violations. Look for my article on "boundaries."

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3 Giant Ways to Help Yourself

By: Lindsay

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