Caregivers With Self-Respect Wanted
Caregivers With Self-Respect Wanted
Caregivers With Self-Respect Wanted
Sure, we can raise the need for unconditional self-love, but taking care of oneself has been repeated so many times, it doesn't seem to draw as much attention, anymore.
Caregiver self-respect is when a caregiver respects herself enough that she doesn't compromise her own survival while selflessly (slave-like) caring for her loved one. (We're conveniently using "she" for gender references because about 65% of caregivers are women.)
A caregiver with self-respect gains knowledge, takes respites, and asks for help before it's too late!
1. Gains knowledge.
She gains awareness from online courses, community workshops, support groups, caregiving friends, hotlines, and even caregiver retreats. These will help her to know more about her loved one's illness/disease and how to best provide care. Search online for "Alzheimer" and "caregiviver blog" for local and online sources of help.
2. Takes respites.
The caregiver with self-respect steps away from the role of caregiver for a few minutes, a few hours, or even a few days to do something that doesn't involve caregiving.
Oftentimes, we stubbornly push ahead, hoping things will get easier after we do this one more thing. We find it difficult to let go because we wonder who else could provide better care?
The Caregiver with Self-Respect
1. Gains knowledge - through support groups, seminars, online in order to be more aware.
2. Takes respites - time when YOU are the focus; whether for 5 minutes, 5 hours, or 5 days.
3. Asks for help - asks for specific help when needed and before it's too late
The truth is, from sheer exhaustion, we can spiral down to persistent depression and ill-health and then what good are we?
4. Asks for help.
This is the most difficult for caregivers to do and for others to offer.
Oftentimes, others will say: Let me know if you need anything.
This polite offer is too broad and further overwhelms the exhausted caregiver whose mind quickly zips through an unlimited list of items and then freezes resulting in an equally polite reply:Sure. Thanks. I will.
Instead, the knowledgeable caregiver who needs a respite calls a family member, friend, or neighbor (whoever answers the phone, first) and asks for help: Can you look after John Thursday afternoon? I really need a break and would like to get my hair and nails done.
The caregiver who has enough self-respect to take care of her own needs will return refreshed and better able to care for her loved one.
Do you know a caregiver who practices self-respect? Share these three tips with him/her.
Brenda Avadian, MA, an award-winning speaker, serves as a national spokesperson for family and professional caregivers and is an internationally acclaimed author. Brenda advocates making use of the caregiving continuum, including support groups, geriatric assessment, educational sessions, in-home care, adult day care, elder law services, clinical studies, and residential, assisted living, or nursing care. Having been a caregiver, she now brings hope and strength to caregivers around the world through knowledge, humor, and tears of joy.
For more information about caregiving and self-respect, read "Where's my shoes?" My Father's Walk through Alzheimer's athttp://www.thecaregiversvoice.com/products-services/tcv-books/wheres-my-shoes/.
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