Every Neighborhood Needs An Irish Pub

I love a good drink, and I especially love drinking and eating great food with good friends

. I have always enjoyed themed bars and restaurants and have had a lot of fun at our local Scottish pub. It is fun, and all of my friends like it. There is only one problem. I'm not Scottish; I'm Irish, and believe me, it is not the same thing at all. It might look and sound similar to the uneducated eye and ear, but there are plenty of differences.

Don't get me wrong; we Irish and the Scottish have a long and happy history together. We have shared a common enemy more than once, and our language and culture are similar, but there are differences. For starters, our names sound similar, but there are subtly different. They are "Mac," and we are "Mc." My mother's family were McDonald's from County Cork. The Scottish half of MacDonalds have been defending Scotland for centuries, fighting in all of the major battles and working for the glory of the Bonnie Prince Charlie.

The Irish side, however, does not have time to waste in such bloodthirsty affairs. We have been building fast food empires that span the globe, including both Ireland and Scotland. I am pretty sure we have the right idea. Getting rich usually sounds a lot better than fighting and dying, and if I had to choose between one or the other, all things considered, I think I would rather eat a hamburger and a drink a Shamrock shake than kill a man.

So what we need is a proper Irish pub, where we can drink whiskey, sing Irish songs, eat meat pies, and throw darts. I want to be able to sit down to a plate of sausages and champ with people who actually know what those are, listen to loud Celtic bands, and talk about old times, spent with beautiful girls with long red hair who look great in green sweaters and flannel miniskirts.

It has been said that we Irish have revolutionized the world; now it is time to revolutionize the drinking and dining scene. We have survived every deprivation thinkable, know more than one way to prepare potatoes, and have helped build and grow the United States into what it is today. Bring on a proper Irish pub, I say, and let the whiskey flow until there is only water left to drink.

by: Art Gib

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