How To Take Things Slowly When Dating?

Dating is something that should not be taken to mean nothing if you are looking for the love of your life

. It is a sacred process in the fact that you really have to build a solid friendship between yourself and the special individual and the feeling has to be mutual. Learning to make a deep connection with someone slowly can develop a bond with your potential mate that can last a lifetime.

One of the ways to take things slowly is really about knowing yourself very well, in fact you must be able to accept or reject a possible partner based on whether their personality will fit with your as well as whether you find them physically attractive. You must take the time to really find out who the person you are attracted to is and think about your compatibility. It's not enough to find out the person's occupation or some of the foods this person likes.

You have to know what they are all about. Are they are creative soul? What kind of creative things he/she likes to get into such as art, inventing, or even cooking on the side? You can build mutual interests or find the pleasure in having differences so you can learn from each other. It makes your friendship even stronger.

You must find out all about their nature and personality, do they have a selfish streak? Are they uncommonly kind? Do they have a gullible side? Are they competitive? Focused? Driven? Laid back? Sensible with money or do they like to spend too much? Do they take care of their family or is their job more important? Do they like to travel or would they prefer to do DIY? Do they like pets? Are they cat or dog people? Do they already have children, want children or might never want children? None of these attributes will be absolute deal breakers in themselves for some people but they might be for you. This is why getting a sense of whether your personalities and life-styles will be complimentary will form a huge part of your future happiness.

Still get out there and see your friends at the same point as dating. This is great way to take things slow because your focus is not all on a relationship. You have a life outside of this and it's very good to get away. You'll have your own personal space and not be so clingy to this new person. At the beginnings of a potential relationship, this is one of the problems. When one person feels that his/her personal space is taken up by one person, the friendship may become a bit wearisome and feel like a burden rather than something to treasure and enjoy. It's important to not be so on top of each other to kind of build the fondness of seeing each other again.

Even in the case of going on dating sites, a person may be actually apprehensive to meet you. Pictures via emails and phone calls might be a good way to start, although do not give out too much personal information about your address or workplace there are stalkers out there so you must go even more slowly at this point. Even if you are from an entirely different part of the country, a video chat service like skype is an excellent way to see the person face to face. This could be the determining factor in meeting each other and taking your virtual relationship into a real life one.

When you do plan on dating, make sure the date is in a public space and ensure you end the first few dates in public too. This keeps you from being too intimate and going way too fast. For those on dating sites, this could mean a meet up with some friends at a mutual spot where both of you can meet halfway. You can bring some friends along to ensure safety and to keep things on a more platonic level. If you've been in a good friendship for a while, try going out on a first proper date to a public dance event like a swing dance class or to a sports game. You could have fun with casual foods at a cooking class. There are a lot of different things to choose from that won't entice being physically intimate and will help you know the person properly before you decide to take the next step.

by: Angela Selfridge

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