Security Humor

Its been proven that humor is good for your health

, good for business, relationships and more! Theres definitely something to be said for humor, even when it relates to crime. Below are two stories that are particularly amusing from a security stand point.

Security Guard Fired

A security guard was hired at a recently opened factory when management realized there had been several internal thefts on the night shift. The security guard was assigned a gate and was to assure he checked employees leaving the premises for stolen goods each night when the shift was done.

Everything was going smoothly at the end of shift check out when a man pushing a wheelbarrow full of newspapers came next in line. Aha, thought the security guard, hes covering up something hes stolen with the newspapers. The security guard checked the newspaper thoroughly only to find that nothing was hidden.

He still felt that something was fishy about the man and asked him about the newspapers. I get a little extra money from the newspapers I recycle. So I collect all the newspapers out of the lunchroom that people have thrown away. The guard let him pass but decided to keep a close eye on him in the future.

The next night came the same man with his wheelbarrow full of newspapers and again the security guard checked them coming up with nothing. This went on week after week with the same results.

Then one night a year later, the security guard was called to head office for his annual review and was told he would be let go due to poor performance. Fired?! he asked in complete surprise. Ive done my job well, Ive never let anything stolen through my gate!

Oh really, the boss answered. Then how do you explain the disappearance of 365 wheelbarrows?!

Man Dressed in Cow Suit Shoplifts 26 Gallons of Milk from Walmart

Someone dressed in a cow suit somehow managed to leave a busy Virginia Walmart with 26 gallons of milk! Youre wondering how this could be funnier. The culprit apparently left the store on all fours! Haha

Afterwards, the mischievous cow began handing out milk (yes, still in the suit) at another location to anyone passing by. Police apprehended the individual at a nearby McDonalds the same evening, without his suit, which was found in his vehicle.

It was most likely a prank, but the real question though is how he made it past the loss prevention workers, cashiers and greeters with a large quantity of milk?! At this time the sheriffs department said it will not be releasing the surveillance video of the incident.

by: Renee Laurin

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