Self-centered Goal Program - Sorry, That's The Wrong Center
Continually looking for new personal goal setting ideas
, a recent Internet search for "personal development" resulted in 157,000,000 results. Quite intriguing.
All kinds of folks are publishing articles and templates to fill out with information and facts about how to help us help ourselves. Or, maybe to "fix" ourselves.
And generally speaking, we are swallowing it, hook, line, and sinker. We believe we deserve better.
We, as a overall group of people, are hunting for methods to get better. For what reason?
* Improve self esteem
* Strengthen our human relationships
* Look better
* Feel better
* Get a better occupation
* Generate more money
* You may fill in the blank for your own search.
But here's the issue. The more you (or I) completely focus upon yourself, the more you will see yourself as coming up short of the level of flawlessness. It's a spiral. Personal goal setting, or personal development normally points to introspection. i.e., turning a focus on ourselves. This, in turn, leads to a self-centered focus.
In a recent blog post, John Carlson identified the following:
"Your ego is like a snarling little yap dog. Always pissed off, or looking for reasons to go into a hissy fit.
I'm telling you, after years of seeing all sides of this: Your ego is not doing you any favors.
Your ego...
...is an idiot.
And it's robbing you blind..."
That's pretty graphic. But the part about "your ego... is an idiot" really struck home.
OK, so this is more of a personal rant. But I can see many people with the identical self-centered focus.
"How can I produce more... How can I persuade so-and-so... How can I - I - I."
It's time to take a completely different perspective. Revise your personal goal program and switch your focal point so that it is no longer looking inward. As an alternative to being ego-centered, we need to begin the process of being "others-centered".
This is not something I recently concocted on my own. It dawned on me recently that Zig Ziglar said this time and time again, "If you will just help enough people get what they want, you will have everything you want."
I acquired that tape series over 30 years ago when I first tried to set up a personal goal setting plan. Listened to it hundreds of times.
Just this week it completely made sense... duh! What an idiot I am.
But, hey, it could have taken longer, I guess.
Most recently (and the cause for the "lightbulb experience") I have been reading Go-Givers Sell More by Bob Burg and John David Mann. The entire book is about how obnoxious us self-centered men and women are and why we fail in our efforts to influence others... whatever it is we are trying to attain, especially sales.
Go-Givers Sell More is a sequel to The Go-Giver. You should read them both because it will give you a new point of view on how to become more prosperous, not only with sales, but also with relationships and anything else related to interacting with people.
Individually, I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted. The stress of performing so that I look good to others simply is not there right now. It feels real good.
We (I) need to rewrite our personal goal program with a new perspective.
I am a huge fan of personal development and personal goal setting. I just have missed the mark.... for a long time.
Hoping you don't do the same.
by: Mark Jimson
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