The Energy Of Your Sayings And Thinkings

Even though it may appear relatively innocuous

, our thoughts and our words have lot of strength and determine what we actually are.

Let see an often repeated phrase "Yes, but". Here you are trying to outdo someone else's opinion by trying to suppress it. In fact, you have just completely discounted the other person's opinion by saying a word "but". If you as person indulge in this then you are creating a block in communication with other people and infact are not being at all fair to that person. If on the other hand you don't use it, you then simply hear the other person's views and send them the message that you may not agree with his views but you still allow him to express his views to you. Thus this way you don't want to dis-empower them even when you don't agree with them on their views.

You can simply overcome this inhibition by expressing your views like, "yes, and" instead of "yes, but". This would allow for both opinions to stay and remain valid. This results in more open exchange of views, instead of creating mental blocks.

Few other words like "always", forever" and "never" also creates hindrance in communication. First thing, it is very rare that something is there "always" or is "never" true. Exceptions are always there. For excellent communication to happen, make habit to avoid this type of wordings and generalization during your talks with others.

There is another word which you should avoid if you can is "try". That is if you are not sure if you can or can not do something, then may be you may "try" to do something. Here you are not sure whether you can do that thing or not, depends on if you have ever attempted to that thing before. It is better to avoid this word because if you say to someone that you are going to "try, then you are not committing your self. Therefore you should be clear and should say yes or no to the other person.

You must have understood that the better you care about the words you speak or phrases you use, the better your communication skills would develop. You will see that little attention given to your talking skills would improve your relationships with others to a great extent.

by: Michael C. Miller

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