Want to Win Back Your Ex? Why No Contact is a Helpful Strategy

Want to Win Back Your Ex? Why No Contact is a Helpful Strategy

Losing a loved one due to a relationship breakup is a traumatizing ordeal. This has been termed one of the reasons for acute sadness, loss of self-esteem and even depression. Every day, a relationship somewhere goes sour and the couple ends up separating. This can be because of any number of reasons from infidelity, to boredom to loss of love and even abuse. Regardless of the reason, those who have found themselves in this predicament can attest to the fact that it is one of the lowest points of one's life. Are you in this situation? Perhaps you want to get your ex back. There are many relationships that never get mended, but there are also those which do.

Of you want to get your ex back, there are certain things that you must do. One of them is what has been termed no contact or NC. Many people who want to win their ex back make one grievous mistake and that is, hounding their ex. This can be perceived as stalking. Following your ex everywhere, or calling them all the time is not a recommended strategy when attempting to get your ex back.

Let us look at the benefits of no contact.

Effects the healing process

Recent research has placed the loss of a relationship almost on the same level as loss of a loved one by death. Sometimes the acute sadness, pain and depression that accompany the demise of the union is so intense that some parties actually commit suicide. There is also a loss of self-esteem that sometimes can take years and extensive therapy to overcome. That is why you need time away from the relationship. In many cases, constant contact with your ex only aggravates the pain because in most cases, unwholesome words are exchanged. Your ex will also keep reminding you that you are not worth their time. No contact therefore, is ideal for healing.

Time to reflect

The acute pain that accompanies a breakup is usually caused by withdrawal. This is because in many cases when we are in a relationship, we have come to derive most of our self-esteem and self-worth from that relationship. That usually comes in the form of verbal validation that the couple in love shower on each other. When this is violently withdrawn, so goes our self-worth and out world comes crushing down.

No contact can help in reflecting our past, our present and our future. This means that you can have time away to reflect on whether the relationship was really as wholesome as it claimed to be. In many abusive relationships (if you were the one who was abused), no contact helps you ask yourself tough questions. One of those questions is whether it is really worth making the massive investment to try and salvage the relationship. It helps you go through the high points and the low points of the relationship and determine whether the person was an asset or a liability.

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