After The Break Up - Should I Delete My Ex?
The break up is still fresh in your mind, and all of the advice you've been getting
has been telling you to, absolutely, under no circumstances, stop all contact with your ex. This is sound advice, after the break up, whether your desire is to try to get back together or not. If you have any hope of reconciling with your ex, it is especially important not to resume immediate contact.There are plenty of valid reasons for the no contact rule: You're both still too emotional; You and your ex both need time and space; Any distance makes the heart grow fonder; You don't want to give your ex the satisfaction; etc. The question then becomes, "Should I just delete my ex'?
Good question. It could actually prove to be somewhat cathartic to simply erase your ex from your life in that way. But, there are some good reasons why you shouldn't.
Here are five reasons not to delete your ex from your contact list:
What if your ex does call? At least when your ex does try to call, you'll be able to recognize the number and then have the presence of mind and the pleasure of simply not answering. If your ex tries to reach you through an unrecognized number you'll end up in an untimely or unwanted conversation.
You might get a text message. Again, as long as you are on the receiving end of these kinds of contacts, you are in control and can simply choose not to respond. More pleasure. More control. All good.
You don't delete your friends. If, for some reason, you're flame is not rekindled and you don't get your ex back, your ex may turn out to be a good friend - as most do. And, even now, should an emergency arise and you're friend needs you, you'll be able to be there for your "new friend".
It's still a contact. For career or business purposes, we spend years building up contacts and networks. Your ex still provides a link to other contacts and networks that may still be able to help you when you need career help or are looking for business contacts. For now, your ex's number in your contacts is there to remind you not to call.
You're ready to lift the "No Contact Rule". Gradually, over time, the conditions for resuming contact with you ex will change. It may start out with an exchange of friendly texts and then graduate into an exchange of voice messages. That's the way you both can feel when the time is right for some phone or face-to-face contact. You'll want to have the number handy.
So, by all means, do follow the "No Contact" advice, but don't be a dope about it. You have the control with the number still in your contacts, so use it wisely if you want to get your ex back. The answer to Should I delete my ex? is a resounding no.
by: Elena Morgan