Hope For The Selfish

Hope For The Selfish

Hope For The Selfish

By Barrett Bramstedt

I'm a cynic, and a selfish person. Yet, I'm bearable enough to feel guilt for not giving back to those from whom I take so freely. I also feel fear payback, or karma - one day finding that I've emptied this kindness account that I've been tapping all these years. This guilt and fear of retribution affects me, yet I feel unable to change - I'm a big stubborn asteroid in a stubborn orbit. Thankfully for me, a fortunate chain of events occurred recently that acted like a giant space whale to gently nudge and bump me out of my stubborn asteroid orbit and onto a more virtuous trajectory.

It started last Thursday, at bedtime, when I read an article about an event hosted by the U.S. State Department in commemoration of the International Day of Persons with Disabilities. I fell asleep thinking "How pointless. What good does 'observing' such a day really produce?" Then, at 3 in the morning, I awoke with my TV tuned to a showing of 'Changeling', a movie about a woman in 1920s-era Los Angeles whose only child is kidnapped by a convicted child murderer, and is assumed to be among the victims. Near the end however, we learn that he was last seen running into the woods following a late-night escape. During the final scene, the mother says "Three boys made a run for it that night. If one got out, maybe either or both of the others did too. Either way, it gives me something I didn't have before tonight. Hope."

The film made realize that I really CAN help people and avoid divine retribution. I may still be selfish in the sense that it may never be easy for me to exert physical effort or to dispense funds to help someone, but I can certainly give hope in other ways. Through the simple act of giving a pep talk, by dispensing advice, or by making someone laugh, acts which do come easy for me, I can dispense hope, and thus plant a seed in someone's subconscious that may bear just enough fruit to get them through the night, or to nourish them indefinitely and ultimately make a change. Days before her death, Elizabeth Edwards, the wife of former senator John Edwards wrote "I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious." I'm confident that the State Department's 'International Day of Persons with Disabilities' event planted hope in many individuals, and empowered many more to go out and do the same. Let's continue to support the nurturing of hope, in whatever form it may come in and do our part to make the world a better place.

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