Maintaining A Positive Mental Attitude
Maintaining A Positive Mental Attitude
Maintaining A Positive Mental Attitude
Leaving the armed forces and starting any transition into civilian life and civilian work place can be a real headache and a massive change. Remember, it is what you make of it and it does not have to be a negative experience. The key to any successful management of change is controlling expectations and advanced planning (isn't that what you learned in the services anyway?).
Three typical anxieties and three simple applications could pave the way to a successful resettlement and a great second career:-
What expectations do you have about yourself? What type of job you will get; how about starting a small business; how quickly will it take to get fully settled in a new role; or even simply how will you manage your home relationships now you are available.
What expectations do you have of others? This could be your new work colleagues, family or friends outside the Services. What help can you expect and who should you ask for the flip side....I won't ask as it is a sign of weakness.
Finally there's your expectation of what could happen within your new environment and what is will turn out like. Perhaps your first job outside the Services becomes a stop gap and not as you expected or hoped. Your work colleagues don't seem to have that "togetherness" you are used to and often the procedures under which you work appear more regimented than when you were in the armed forces. It could be a worry about where to live, how will the finances work out now I have many more opportunities to spend and bills to pay.
Don't lose the game before it has even begun. Put your mindset in order and focus like you have been taught to do all through your military career.
Where are you today? Knowing whether your glass is half full or half empty is a great start to becoming positively charged and developing a positive attitude. Whether you feel afraid or indeed quite confident taking the next step this self awareness is strength. You will not be fooling yourself and are more likely to be aware of the implications of your actions.
No doubt there were many parts of Service life that you did not like. Perhaps these are now your reasons for leaving, however, if you hang on to them and bring them with you to your new Civilian parade ground, very little will change. Put them into perspective and reach beyond them. Alternatively, if working nine to five doesn't live up to what you had before, then the downward spiral will take hold and your environment will become what you imagine it to be not the reality of what it actually is.
Spend a few moments every morning in the mindset of the Olympic 100 meter runner. Just prior to the starting gun, they are primed, confident and their tunnel vision focused upon the end goal to be attained in ten seconds. Now any second career takes a lot more time to come true but the principle of the runner creating a powerful vision remains true. They train hard, are dedicated to task and have a desirable skill set. This leads them towards their personal Gold. Now, instead of that Gold medal, what do you see? At the end of every tunnel there is today's goal, today's task to be completed to the best of your ability. In no time you will have a collection of medals and a stronger mindset towards what need to be done.
When you start to look for improvements in your circumstances, that's when you're going to find them.
So you know where you are today, what else? We all have things we have to accept and that we may not like to do. Having the strength to see these for what they are, accepting them and getting on with the bigger task, is another key element in the successful transition formula.
Remember nothing is personal and only directed at you. Whether you can change these things or not is not the issue here. It is about accepting and looking beyond them to pastures new. For every issue you may have with a work colleague there will be two others who you do see the positives in and who can add value to your second career.
For every aspect of the wider environment that you don't like, remember also it is your choice about how much time and effort you want to lose by not moving on from them when you should really be utilizing your time on things you judge to be valuable to you and the things key to your new life.
So now you're focused and positive. You have accepted the environment you don't want and cannot change and have started to look beyond this temporary state. What's next? The simple answer is to take action. This becomes a lot easier now you have the correct mind set (for the Services have already provided you with the correct skill set). You are more likely to identify those elements that may be holding you back if indeed there are any. Likewise, this new found positive energy will help overcome the obstacles or dead ends as and when they appear.
It is right to be fearful of change. This understanding and acceptance of change can bring out additional strengths that you already have but are rarely utilized. The transition process should be a simple and straight forward process and can be if you have the correct mental foundations upon which to build your second career search strategy.
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