Different Traditions Dealing With Loss

Different cultures have different ways to deal with loss

, mourning, and commemoration. Jews say the Mourner's Kaddish, or the Jewish prayer for the dead. Christians and Catholics say a different prayer of mourning. Eastern traditions view death entirely differently.

Buddhists believe that death marks the end of someone's life but also the beginning. They view death as the last phase of someone's life before they are reborn again. Buddhist traditions are based around idea of rebirth. Often times, clothing or other things are offered to give merit to the deceased in the hope they have a strong start in their new lives.

Days after the funeral, there will be a small sermon of sorts in the house of the deceased person. Here, food is served and people share fond memories and life lessons. Much like in the Jewish memorial service, people often give to charity on the person's behalf. Both cultures use charity to honor the deceased and to make those left behind feel more connected to the deceased.

In Japan, most people are cremated. People will often sort through the ash with chopsticks and pass the bones among family members. This is a way the relatives can feel one last moment of intimacy with the deceased. Sometimes, people are given new names in death so dead spirits don't return upon hearing their names called. Japanese family members will decorate the bed and room of the deceased with flowers, incense, and decorative paper. This differs greatly from a Jewish memorial service where cremation is frowned upon.

Islam explicitly outlaws cremation, so Muslims are buried. A Muslim burial is fairly simple and entails washing the body, shrouding it, and burying it. During the burial, special prayers are recited. Since there are so many Muslims in the world, regional traditions that dictate funeral rites also heavily influence the proceedings.

There are some funeral traditions observed by many cultures. Many cultures have a meal before or after the service itself. Most cultures gather friends and family of the deceased for the ceremony. Many cultures also make use of a dual ceremony; one for friends, relatives and associates and one for only people very close to the deceased.

Many African funeral ceremonies have both celebratory and mourning aspects. On the west coast of Africa, funeral rites often consist of two parts; one in which people drink, sing, and dance in honor of the person and another in which people cry and mourn.

by: Mark Etinger

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