Teaching Children Good Manners is Crucial
Teaching Children Good Manners is Crucial
Teaching Children Good Manners is Crucial
Have you ever opened a door for someone and that person walked through without having the common courtesy to say, "Thank you?" or, have you ever had someone ask you to do something without using the word, "Please?" I am sure that these situations have happened to you countless times as it has to me. Rudeness is rampant in our culture, and it seems to be getting out of control. We seem to take pride in being repulsive.
Unfortunately, people who exhibit good manners are difficult to find much like finding a needle in a haystack. We no longer perceive it as something of importance, but when we display these inappropriate behaviors as mentioned above, we set a poor example for our children. We are conveying an indirect message to them that it is acceptable to conduct ourselves this way, so they grow up thinking that these behaviors are the norm. Attitudes like these can be a hindrance to one's success in life and can totally ruin one's reputation.They are not acceptable. Therefore, children need to be aware of this.
Having good manners, however, encompasses more than just saying, "Please" and "Thank you." It includes such variables as being punctual, responding promptly to invitations, knowing how to conduct oneself appropriately in diverse situations such as home, school, church, grocery store, at the table, on the telephone, etc. There is a lack of sensitivity to the needs and feelings of others in our society which makes life even more stressful. Life is filled with challenges and is complicated as it is, so it is like a breath of fresh air when we meet people who do not demonstrate such uncouth actions. It is a pleasant experience and a novelty that help to alleviate some of the tensions and frustrations that we so often encounter. The irony of the situation is that though most of us exhibit these despicable behaviors, we would rather not have any interactions with people who conduct themselves in the same manner. We all admire and respect others who behave themselves well.
Our children are going to be the men and women of tomorrow, and in order to alter the future and prevent this issue from reaching epidemic proportion, we have to instill certain values and principles in them. As children generally mimic adults, adults need to model the behaviors that they would like them to replicate. It is counterproductive for grown ups to tell children to act in specific ways when they are not practicing the mannerisms themselves. As good manners begin at home, parents need to model the desired behaviors there. This responsibility should not be left solely on the shoulders of educators. As an educator myself, I know how diligently we have worked to instill certain principles in our students, and it becomes a daunting task when parents fail to teach their children the proper way of conducting themselves. Both parents and teachers should work cooperatively to teach and reinforce appropriate behaviors so that they can grow up to be the best that they can be. Bad manners should not be tolerated at home or at school.
The ramifications of not teaching children good manners are that they become disrespectful, egotistical, and insensitive to the needs of others. It is no surprise that many children are disrespectful to their peers, teachers, and to other adults. Being courteous to others is important. Words such as "Please," Thank you," "Good morning," should be a part of a child's every day vocabulary. Children need to learn from an early age to use the word, "Please" when asking for something and "Thank you" when the request is granted. In addition, they need to know that burping loudly at the dinner table and in public places is rude. Screaming or slamming down the phone in someone's ear is totally unacceptable, so too is not showing up for a scheduled appointment without a valid reason and without an explanation. Interrupting other people's conversations without saying, "excuse me" and "talking back" to adults are other forms of rudeness.
For children to truly comprehend the significance of having good manners, it is equally important to explain to them why certain actions are inappropriate. Displaying proper manners then, will have more meaning. Children who behave badly outside of the confines of the home, leave a bad reflection on their parents, because it gives others the impression that they are not being taught courtesy at home. Whatever we practice ultimately becomes a part of us. Therefore, good manners must be cultivated if they are going to have any impact.
Responding positively by saying, "Thank you" to a stranger who might have opened a door for you for example, shows the person that you are appreciative of what he or she has done. That individual has no obligation to hold the door open for you or to demonstrate any act of kindness to you. Therefore when someone goes above and beyond what is expected, it is only fair that this person receives some form of recognition. Responding positively will also encourage the person to reproduce the behavior.
Being uncouth is not good for any kind of business, and many people miss out on golden opportunities because of their repugnant ways. Sir Richard Bronson, founder of Virgin Atlantic Airways had a reality show a few years ago. The objective was to find a suitable individual who would later assist him in running his business. The contenders had to go through rigorous activities to determine their eligibility for the position. The episode that resonates with me was when he disguised himself as a poor, tattered, old man sitting at the back of a taxi cab. Two girls who were participants of the show happened to take the same taxi. The moment they sat next to him, they began to treat him with contempt. They were rather rude in the manner in which they conducted themselves, and in the way they treated him. The girls were completely unaware of whom this man was.
Later, he revealed to them that he was the old man sitting at the back of the taxi. They were flabbergasted! He booted them off the show but not before explaining that neither one of them would be an asset to his business. One cannot operate a successful business if one judges people based on appearances, and treats people with disrespect. This was an opportunity of a lifetime, but their journey came to an end all because of their attitude. No doubt they must have learned a valuable lesson from this experience.
If we do not do something to alleviate the situation, the future of our society and that of our children will be in jeopardy. These words from Whitney Houston's song, "The Greatest Love of All" sum it up. "Children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way."
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